Category Archives: Uncategorized

Oh Lord God I find myself troubled with the battle within, sadness fills my soul. The regrets of my life overwhelm me, the loss of my wife disturbs my soul. When I leave my home, I am confronted with the world it disheartens what I believe, My soul cries for the world and wishes forContinue reading “Battles”

I took a nap and I wish that the dream I had did not disturb me so much. This has become normal for me lately. I bought a sleep number bed when I could, it is wonderful it keeps track of my sleep patterns and tells me when I did not sleep well. The onlyContinue reading “Time with God”

Trying to focus on God          When sequestered by forces beyond your control, focus wavers. Instead of focus  distraction, seek to take your mind off the situation going on around you. If you are single any distraction can be exciting for the moment but eventually that is not enough.  When you have finished all theContinue reading “Focus”

Good thoughts in bad times Psalms 12, for the Godly man stopped appearing: for the faithful fail from among the children of men. They speak vanity everyone with his neighbor: with flattering lips and with a double heart do they speak. The lord shall cut off flattering lips, and the tongue that speaks proud things:Continue reading “Good news from the bad”

Mother’s Day When I think about this day, I think of four great Mothers, the first was my late wife Martha. She was a mother to my children as well as many other children over the years. She had a way of telling the truth to these children without diminishing their spark. All I canContinue reading “Mom’s”

Today I began to deal with trash or memories I do not like or want, guess grief is not over. But when do you let go and move on, or should I say when will I learn that life is more difficult than I want it to be? Jesus said, “And whoever does not takeContinue reading “What is my Cross”

Forgive me I have not written in a while because I allowed the devil to distract me, with a woman. No, I never met her only had pictures, and by all accounts she was beautiful. But darkness laid inside her, this darkness was caused by her extreme wealth. I am not totally sure she wasContinue reading “I ask your forgiveness”

I am truly amazed at how God has everything written out for all of us. We have all heard the statement Basic, Instructions, Before, Leaving, Earth or Bible. I recently allowed my Bible to fall open and what did I find? Psalm 11, the lord is our refuge. Here God through the psalms tells usContinue reading “Amazed”

loneliness            I believe in Jesus, getting a hug from him is hard especially during this time in our history. I believe that every hug from a believer is a hug from God, Jesus, and the Holy Spirit. This leaves me with this thought as we are prevented from hugging during this time, we findContinue reading “The loneliness”

When time stops Martha was speaking to people that were not visible to anyone but her. When I asked, who she was speaking to she said, “My Mom and someone you will meet in person today.” It was one of my daily visits to her at the rehab facility where she resided after her strokeContinue reading “When Time Stops”

 Three A.M. The voices linger on that delicate boundary between dream and reality. I awaken abruptly, shuddering. Reaching over, I turn on the light. As real as the dream seemed, I find myself alone. It is yet another night of interrupted sleep. My eyes scan the room. I am drenched in a cold sweat, suchContinue reading “Three AM”

Out and About with my Uncle Tom The day after my Uncle Terry’s Homegoing Service, my Mom asked me to take my Uncle Tom to lunch so they could travel back to Enid for the Internment Service scheduled for early afternoon.  Tom simply was not physically or emotionally up for yet another reminder of theContinue reading “Corrected version :Out and About with my Uncle Tom”

Out and About with my Uncle Tom The day after my Uncle Terry’s Homegoing Service, my Mom asked me to take my Uncle Tom to lunch so they could travel back to Enid for the Internment Service scheduled for early afternoon.  Tom simply was not physically or emotionally up for yet another reminder of theContinue reading “Out and About with my Uncle Tom”

 Do you know what love is? Well I do. Twenty-four years of marriage and it was amazing.   Yes, it had its up’s and down’s, but we got through them with love and God by our side. But as Martha would remind me THIS TOO SHALL PASS—LIKE A KIDNEY STONE, BUT IT WILL PASS.  SureContinue reading “Do you Know what love is?”

Last week I wrote that time heals all wounds, guess what All wounds are healed by time but only Jesus can heal the Spiritual hurt. Having gone through the loss of my wife Martha, I have found that the loss is at times overwhelming. I am healing very well because I recognized I needed help.Continue reading “Time”

  Yes, it does, how much time it takes, I am not completely sure of I am told it will be determined by what you are willing to admit and let go of. So, here is some questions for all of you, number one, Are you in denial of the wound? If you lose aContinue reading “Time heals all wounds?”

Hi everyone, I wish that my grief was over, but it is not. If you ask, I will answer with I am ok, I am surviving, or even I am good. The truth is I want my Martha with me, by my side, but that is not going to happen. This is not God’s fault,Continue reading “A letter to my friends and family”

Have you ever, thought that the world is out to destroy you?   Well I have news for you, it is not the world who wants to destroy you. The entity that wants to destroy you is evil. In the darkness lurks a spirit determined to keep you from, the most loving as well asContinue reading “Have you ever”

What do you fear that they will judge you, for what, are you afraid they will Kill you? Ha! Is this not what you want, to the ones you love? Or will they see through the cracks that make you normal? What can they do to you that you have not already experienced? What indignityContinue reading “In all I Serve Christ”

 The Dragon of Grief has one claw greater than all the others. This claw will bring even the best believers to the valley of death, where only God, Jesus, and the Holy Spirit can guide you through. Its Name is depression the power of feeling alone, lost, extremely sad, it can mess with your beliefsContinue reading “The Knight Of Testimony”