one year of grief

Exactly one year ago I began a journey I did not want; this journey would redefine my existence. The life I knew would be changed in the most profound ways. My reason for working, for play, for staying on this earth, had left me for the home all believers in Jesus, God’s only son, desire to be. I am left by Martha to endure this earth without her, something I did not want to do.

This journey would be as a knight confused by what had happened, Martha and I had endured many troubles in our marriage. Her health was always a question mark in our time together, she was my wife, I was her husband, we loved, laughed, believed together battled as knights back to back fighting a great dragon set out to destroy us. Our love created a shield that would allow us to battle the arrows of lies and deceit the beast fired at us. We would have gone on battling but as the toils of life, and the consequences of sin would allow the shield to weaken, in places the devil himself would be allowed to strike us.

 It was only by belief in God, Jesus, the holy spirit that allowed us to win battle after battle until it was her time to enter heaven. My time has not yet come, and I live for the glory of the lord, I am lonely, but God has allowed a new friend to appear. As this friend and I become closer, the arrows of loneliness, despair, fear of being alone no longer pierce the shield of faith. This type of healing only comes from the prayers not for my self but for others in need.

  I praise you my Lord my God for your blessings during this season of grief, please continue to bless the prayers of your humbled servant. For it has been through your grace and mercy that this knight has been able to endure this dragon of grief. I love you God, Jesus, and the Holy Spirit for the armor you have provided.